Carissa - Sun Kil Moon

Oh Carissa when I first saw you

You were a lovely child

And the last time I saw you

You were fifteen and pregnant

And running wild

I remember wondering

Could there be a light at the end of your tunnel

But I left Ohio then

And pretty much forgotten all about you

I guess you were there some years ago

At a family funeral

But you were one of so many relatives

I didn't know which one was you

Yesterday morning I woke up to so many

330 area code calls

I called my mom back

And she was in tears and asked

How to spoke to my father

Carissa burned to death

Last night in a freak accident fire

In her yard in Bruster her daughter

Came home from a party and found her

Same way as my uncle

Who was her grandfather

An aerosol can blew up in the trash

Goddamn what were the odds

She was just getting ready to go to her

Midnight shift as an RN is Rosworth

And she vanished up in flames like

That but there had to be more to her life's worth

Everyone's grieving out of their minds

Making arrangements and taking ***

But I'm flying out there tomorrow

Because I need to give and get some hugs

Cause I got questions that

I'd like to get answered

I may never get them

But Carissa gotta know how did it happen

Carissa was thirty-five

You don't just raise two kids

And take out your trash and die

She was my second cousin

I didn't know her well at all

But it doesn't mean that

I wasn't meant to find some poetry

To make some sense of this

To find a deeper meaning

In a senseless tragedy

Oh Carissa I'll sing your name across every sea

Were you doing someone else's chores for them

Were you just killing time

Finding things to do all by your lonesome

Was it even you mistakenly put

Flammables in the trash

Was it your kids just being kids

And so oh

The guilt they will carry around forever

Well I'm going out there to get

A look at the landscapes

To get a look at those

I'm connected by blood

And see how it all may have shaped me

Well I'm going out there though

I'm not really needed

I'm just so broken up about it

How is it that this sad history repeated

I'll return to Ohio to the place

I was born

Gonna see where

I hung with my cousins

And played with them in the snow

Fist in their palms

Gonna see how they've grown

Visit some greats and say hey

I've missed you

Gonna find out as much as

I can about my second little cousin Carissa

Gonna go to Ohio

Where I was born

Got a 10:45 am flight

I'm leaving tomorrow morning

Gonna see my aunts and my uncles

My parents and sisters

Mostly I'm going to pay my respects to my

Little second cousin Carissa

Going to Ohio where I feel I belong

Ask those who know the most about

Carissa for it her life

And death that I'm helplessly drawn

Carissa was thirty-five

Raised kids since she was fifteen years old

And suddenly died

Next to an old river

Fire pit oh there's gotta be more than that to it

She was only my second cousin

But it don't mean that

I'm not here for her or that

I wasn't meant to give her life poetry

Make sure her name is known across every city