September 1st 1989

Dear diary

I think I'm a good person

I believe there's good in everyone

But here we are first day of senior year

I see these kids I've known all my life and wonder

What happened

Freak Slut

Burnout Bug eyes

Poser Lard a*s

We were so tiny

Happy and shiny

Playing tag and getting chased

Freak Slut

Loser Short bus

Singing and clapping

Laughing and napping

Baking cookies eating paste

Bull dyke Stuck up

Hunchback

Then we got bigger

That was the trigger

Like the Huns invading Rome

Move

Sorry

Welcome to my school this ain't no high school

This is the Thunderdome

Hold your breath and count the days

We're graduating soon

White trash

College will be paradise

If I'm not dead by June

But I know I know

Life can be beautiful

I pray I pray

For a better way

If we changed back then

We could change again

We can be beautiful

Ow

Just not today

Hey are you okay

Get away nerd

Freak Slut Cripple

Homo Homo Homo

Things will get better

Soon as my letter

Comes from Harvard Duke or Brown

Wake from this coma

Take my diploma

Then I can blow this town

Dream of ivy covered walls

And smoky French cafés

Watch this

Fight the urge to strike a match

And set this dump ablaze

Oops

Ram Sweeney

Third year as linebacker

And eighth year of smacking lunch trays

And being a huge d**k

What did you say to me skank

Nothing

But I know I know

Life can be beautiful

I pray I pray

For a better way

We were kind before

We can be kind once more

We can be beautiful

Beautiful

Aagh

Hey Martha

Hey

Martha Dunnstock my best friend since diapers

She's got a huge heart

'Round here that's not enough

Thanks

We on for movie night

You're on Jiffy Pop detail

I rented 'The Princess Bride'

Again

Don't you have it memorised by now

What can I say

I'm a sucker for a happy ending

Martha Dumptruck

If you wanna lose a few pounds

You need more protein in your diet

Kurt Kelly quarterback

He is the smartest guy on the football team

Which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf

What is wrong with you

I'm sorry are you actually talking to me

My buddy Kurt asked you a question

What gives you the right to pick on my friend

Look at you

You're a high school has been waiting to happen

A future gas station attendant

You got a zit right there

Dear diary

Why

Why do they hate me

Why don't I fight back

Why do I act like such a creep

Why

Why won't he date me

Why did I wear this

Why do I cry myself to sleep

Why

Somebody hug me

Somebody fix me

Somebody save me

Send me a sign God

Give me some hope here

Something to live for

Ah Heather Heather and Heather

Then there's the Heathers

They float above it all

I love Heather Heather and Heather

I hate Heather Heather and Heather

Heather McNamara head cheerleader

Her dad's loaded he sells engagement rings

I want Heather Heather and Heather

Heather Duke runs the yearbook

No discernible personality but her mom did pay for implants

I need Heather Heather

And Heather Chandler the Almighty

She is a mythic b***h

The Heathers are solid Teflon

Never bothered never harassed

I would give anything to be like that

I'd like to be their boyfriend

That would be beautiful

If I sat at their table guys would notice me

So beautiful

I'd like them to be nicer

That would be beautiful

I'd like to kidnap a Heather

And photograph her naked in an abandoned warehouse

And leave her tied up for the rats

Grow up Heather bulimia is so '87

Heather I need a mint

What you need Heather is to see a doctor

Ah Heather and Heather

And Heather

Perhaps you didn't hear the bell over all the vomiting

You're late for class

Heather wasn't feeling well we're helping her

Not without a hall pass you're not aweek's detention

What

No way that's not fair

But I've got cheerleader practice

My parents pay your salary

Actually Ms Fleming

All four of us are out on a hall pass

Yearbook committee

I see you're all listed

Hurry up and get where you're going

This is an excellent forgery

Who are you

Veronica Sawyer

I crave a boon

What boon

Let me sit at your table at lunch just once

No talking necessary

If people think you guys tolerate me

They'll leave me alone

Before you answer

I also do report cards permission slips and absence notes

How about prescriptions

Shut up Heather

Sorry Heather

For a greasy little nobody

You do have good bone structure

And a symmetrical face

If I took a meat cleaver down the centre of your skull

I'd have matching halves

That's very important

Of course you could stand to lose a few pounds

And you know you know you know

This could be beautiful

Mascara maybe some lip gloss

And we're on our way

Get this girl some blush

And Heather I need your brush

Let's make her beautiful

Let's make her beautiful

Let's make her beautiful

Make her beautiful

Okay

Okay

Out of my way geek

I don't want trouble

You're gonna die at 3 p m

Don't you dare touch me

Get away pervert

What did I ever do to them

Who could survive this

I can't escape this

I think I'm dying

Who's that with Heather

Whoa

Heather Heather Heather

And someone

Heather Heather Heather

And a babe

Heather Heather Heather

Veronica

Veronica

Veronica

Veronica

And you know you know you know

Life can be beautiful

You hope you dream you pray

And you get your way

Ask me how it feels

Looking like hell on wheels

My God it's beautiful

Beautiful

I might be beautiful

Beautiful

And when you're beautiful

It's a beautiful frickin' day

Heather Heather Heather Veronica

Yeah eah eah

Heather Heather Heather Veronica

Veronica Veronica Veronica

Veronica